Until today, women live in a man’s world and are killed by men every day. And I, down on this planet, think about women I know or don’t know. The woman who could have been. Women who are born from the stars but are living on the Earth.

Post-2008, the name Yi SoYeon was expected to fade into obscurity. Yet, in a surprising turn of events, she was chosen by Roscosmos, the Russian Federal Space Agency, at the last minute to join the Korean astronauts on their Soyuz rocket launch to the International Space Station (ISS). As a young PhD candidate in mechanic engineering, her selection was a sensation that clashed with the traditional image of an astronaut: a man in a space suit.

A young woman with a bright smile among the male Russian astronauts on every media outlet was alien. The hopeful farewell to the sky lasted short. A man who was the finalist but was excluded at the last moment before the launch because he tried to secretly export Russian military files gained traction with the public. The media focused on his act for the sake of the country. Public opinion started changing its idea on Yi: a woman took a man’s spot when it was just a slip.

Post-2007, the name Vanajah Siva was expected to be celebrated. She was the sole woman and Indian candidate among the four finalists in the Angkasawa program, a joint initiative by the Russian and Malaysian governments to send Malaysian astronauts to the ISS via the Soyuz rocket. As a young engineer in a manufacturing company, she faced immense societal pressure and scrutiny from the beginning of the program, which initially had 11,000 candidates.

Yi’s challenges did not end even after the returning ship lost track due to the malfunction during the segregation of the modules and off-landed in a great plateau of Kazakhstan, away from the original landing spot for 500km. The nomads who found the exhausted astronauts covered their eyes from the sun and helped them to rest until the rescue team arrived. For 4 years, Yi travelled across the country, lecturing to students and researchers about the experiences she had on the ISS, even how it was to have menstrual pain in space, and how her body changed during the flight. But there were constant attacks on her, calling her a space tourist, diminishing the meaning of the experiments that could have been executed on Earth as they were simply rudimentary. The harassment by the media persisted until she left Korea after retiring from her position as senior researcher at the Korea Aerospace Research Institute.

Seeing an Indian woman on the television screen doing her schedule as an astronaut candidate at Yuri Gagarin Cosmonaut Training Centre in Russia was not a scene you could see every day. It was not even rare but bizarre. The Malaysian eyes that microanalyze an Indian person every day were now fixated on the most absurd images and sounds that the odd one was making. Gliding from her face to body, not only once but several times, for the insatiable urge that does not subdue even with the centuries of human evolution to obtain manners of respect towards another human being. In the media exposures of the four candidates from different social backgrounds and experiences, their uniforms were equally cobalt blue, and there was only one person from the planet of water to space. During the training, Siva’s aspirations defy gravity – the eyes that pull her down, the eyes scrutinize her behaviours and body, the eyes that show disgust. Every training was a mock-up to familiarise Siva with the accidents that could happen in the space. It was growing muscles to fight against the challenges Siva had never faced. However, the competition among the other candidates was not a new one. It was not a fight between her and other three counterparts; it was her against gender, her colour, and her disbelief of herself; it was her against Malaysian society; it was her against the entire globe. As everyone expected, the two Malay men were the finalists. Down to earth went Vanajah. To the Malaysian Indian society, the failure was disappointing but also familiar. There is no way on earth for an Indian woman in Malaysia to go to space. It was too early – but it was too late. Her winning was not common. Maybe flying was the easiest thing an Indian woman could do.

But their lives afterwards followed an unexpected track. After years of harassment, Yi left Korea for the US, and the media called her a betrayer who fled after she had financially benefited from the tax money. But she didn’t stop pursuing her goals. Similarly, Siva’s life took a different pathway to her passion. After failing to be the finalist, her community brought her to teach young Indian students so she could get a stable income and continue searching for the opportunity to further her studies. Like an exploding supernova, becoming an astronaut left them with a moment they cannot forget. But it was not as great for them to remain at that moment forever; they created a thrust to challenge the new sailing of life. Falling from the sky did not mean they could not rise again.

Yi finished her PhD and has been teaching and guiding students at a faculty at the International Space University. Living in Sweden ever since getting her PhD, Siva has been teaching university students about sustainable social development. The Korean man who was dismissed and substituted by Yi is now a member of the transition team of the Presidential Transition Committee Subcommittee on Science, Technology, and Education in the current far-right wing government of Korea. The Malay man who went to space instead of Siva is selling pseudo medicines certified by him, the first Muslim astronaut in the world who brought satay to space. Yi and Siva did not return to their home countries after their departure.

Until today, 681 people have gone to the space. Only 93 women were involved. Only 8 of them are people of colour. And only 4 Asian women exited the Earth’s atmosphere. And I, down on this planet, think about women I know or don’t know. I remember the women who were crushed, dead, and shamed by the world. I dream of women who are revived by other women. And the women who will be born. And after. And after. As many as stars in the universe, travelling free into the limitless forever.

Written by Juyeoung Kwak

References

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HyungJun, A. (2009), Is Yi Soyeon an astronaut or a space tourist? : The First Korean Astronaut Debate on the view of ANT. Science and Technology Studies, 89 – 127. https://www.dbpia.co.kr/journal/articleDetail?nodeId=NODE01248934

JunKu, K. (2010, May 13). “It hurt my pride because I was not there to tour”… Ko San Reveals After Two Years: ‘Why I Couldn’t Board the Spaceship’. The Kukmin Daily. https://n.news.naver.com/mnews/article/005/0000410547?sid=102

n.d. (2013, October 28). A Muslim Astronaut’s Ramadan and Quran in Space. Masdhiah Mahmood. https://mardmod.wordpress.com/2013/10/18/a-muslim-astronauts-ramadan-and-quran-in-space/

Sandy. (2020, March 25). EXCLUSIVE: Dr Vanajah Siva, the Angkasawan Finalist Who Never Stopped Reaching for the Stars. Varnam MALAYSIA. https://varnam.my/18147/exclusive-dr-vanajah-siva-the-angkasawan-finalist-who-never-stopped-reaching-for-the-stars/

SeokYoo, S. (2008, April 11). Ko San: “Now, Looking at the Stars Makes Me Dizzy”. Chosun Biz. https://biz.chosun.com/site/data/html_dir/2008/04/11/2008041100271.html

YeonHee, K. (2023, April 6). 15 Years Later: The Unexpected Story of Korea’s First Astronaut. Sisa In. https://www.sisain.co.kr/news/articleView.html?idxno=50023

YeonSeo, O. (2022, March 15). “Baek Kyung-ran Becomes President of Infectious Disease Society; ‘Astronaut’ Ko San Joins Yoon Suk-yeol’s Transition Committee”. The Hankyeoreh. https://www.hani.co.kr/arti/politics/politics_general/1034985.html